Sunday, August 12, 2007

Here comes the bride part 2:

So Todd and I arrived in Ellicottville around 1, checked into Holiday Valley, (where I am definitely making the bf go with me skiing this winter), and made our way to where the wedding took place. First, I love the charm of Ellicottville with all its pretty little B&Bs and tiny bars and places to eat. Its cute. So I was imagining the house that Kerri rented for her wedding to be a charming little Victorian with a pretty garden and a jazz band playing in the background. Really though.....this was the strangest wedding I have ever been to. I mean, it was nice. Kerbear and Drew were happy and in love and life is good......but.......

The house was about 2 miles outside the town, up a mountain of a driveway...I was wearing the cutest little silver heels which were not made for mountain climbing so I took them off. There was no flat ground on the property...except for a huge pond. The people who owned the house were there all weekend, getting angry that Kerri had invited so many people to her wedding. (even though they already ok-ed it, kerri had rented out the house for the whole week, and they had promised that they wouldn't be there.) There were not enough chairs for the 50 guests. There were no seating arrangements so one of out friends wound up standing all night while eating his meal that the catering company brought 68 minutes late. There was no cake, there was no "you may kiss the bride", there was no music....that is until the groom, the bride, and their best friend stated singing folk music with the guitar they brought along. I'm not kidding. My typical long island friend who hates anything that seems remotely "hick-like" was singing "Freedom's just another word for nothing left to loose..." at the top of her lungs while standing barefoot at the top of a mountain by a pond, with a crown of daisies in her hair. Granted she did look beautiful....but where was my friend? The bridesmaids were the grooms sisters, one of whom changed her name from Lisa, the Leesha-nan-er, or something like that, which she told me goes back to her pagan and latin roots....huh? But I was allowed to call her Lee if I liked. She also wore a large Afro wig for most of the evening. AN AFRO WIG! (please note she is not an african american woman) There was no first dance, they ran out of alcohol twice and had to run to the store......the groom's grandparents have a full time nurse who stole my shoes, TWICE. She stole my shoes. STOLE THEM! I know that the nurse gets paid for her services, she does not need to steal my shoes. I told her the first time that she shouldn't bother because you can't stand in the grass with them on, but apparently she didn't believe me because she said "Maybe you can't darling, but I am a lady, so I have the skills necessary to walk in heels." and then 30 minutes later proved her point by putting my shoes on her feet and walking around in them...until I noticed. I literally had to threaten to push her in the pond if she didn't relinquish my shoes.


The list goes on.....
I guess the weirdest part of the evening is simply the fact that one of the "fearsome foursome" is married. I have a hard time imagining Kerbear being Mrs. Kerri Ann Nixon. I have a hard time feeling like I am falling behind my friends who have real jobs, spouses, and children. I have a hard time knowing that the four of us won't be having sleepovers where we imagine ourselves marrying movie stars.... Someday I will have to admit that we are growing up....

I'll end by paraphrasing some of the speech that was made in honor of the bride and groom by Leesha-whatever:

"and there should be carrots, and celery, and red and yellow sauerkraut, and beans of all colors and flavors. And cheese, even bland store bought cheese with Gouda and cheddar. and sausage and chestnuts and all kinds of nuts really. pine nuts and almonds and coffee beans with beets...."

I have no idea what that meant....but I assume it must have meant congrats.

Thats Ker on the left, Abby, Todd, and me........

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